.....her life at 26: 2012

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Fifty Shades.

I peel back an old layer of memory each time I write here.

Laters.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

There are a big portions of my life in which I often forget how time pass by so quickly. Quarter first of the year; life still as challenging as ever. I guessed I no longer have time to scribble my emotional thoughts here because I'm constantly exhausted and finding my precious sleep out of work.

Like almost everyone, I would yearn for a fulfilling, happy, healthy and colorful life. We keep searching for something more, wish for things that are beyond our reach and never feel contented. The paradox of life; everybody wants to live a long life, but nobody wants to get old. Everybody wants to go to the heaven, but nobody wants to die. It's a sad melody of yearning. And so, hope is what everyone bears in mind while awaiting new surprises in our lives.

So do I.

Much has changed over the years, unfortunately my relationship status hasn't changed at all. People often think that loneliness is caused by not having a spouse, family and a whole bunch of friends to be with. Think again. A person can have everything and still choose to be lonely. Likewise, a person might not have all of those things and choose not to be lonely. It was from him that I learnt about loneliness, and I'm really thankful for that. The occasional longing for someone does hunt me at night, but I survived. We often hold onto things that we have clearly outgrown, simply because of the comfort we derive from them. It is not until we realize that if we choose to let go onto that which make us drown, we can actually swim. Everybody chooses.

Sometimes we think that the reason why we are unhappy is because of the things that are missing in life. In most cases, happiness is always available to us. Why bother postponing happiness when you have the chance to embrace it every day. The other day when we went for tomb sweeping at our grandparents, devastating memories revisit. People lose loved ones when they are not quite ready to let them go, it's true and when the pain is so personal, the feelings became especially difficult to soothe. I guessed we have all moved on, not because we have forgotten them, or stop loving them, but because we respect the decision to lay them to rest.

Give me the strength to keep on walking, and keep on believing.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Bridge of light.

A lazy, restless welcome to myself on this blog on a year I hope it's new enough to bring me greater happiness. In these days, weeks and months, I tend to fall unconditionally into deep thoughts and concerns, those that have not cross my tiny mind during my younger days. I guess age does change a person. I'm beginning to have faith, at the same time very much afraid of losing it to others. I have been saying this for some time now but there are days that this life is horribly unfair. At the end of it all I find myself breathless, tired and utmost pessimistic. But coming to terms with it for the longest time, it's all part of the puzzle of growing up.

This year, I just want to remain simple. :)